Each one of us has a special someone in our life. It could be our parents, siblings, our love interest, friends, or even pets. Not necessarily a single person. At times, it could be something inanimate. Something that you relate to so well, with which you bond so strong, that just its presence makes you exhilarated. This one goes out to those people/things in each ones life. And most definitely to those in mine.
There are times when I am feeling so low, that I could either pull out my hair, or punch some one else. In such times, I find solace in them. I yell at them, get annoyed by what seems to be the most crest fallen attempts at making me feel better. And yet I know that these are the only attempts that work. Sardonic is it not? Most of us are with these people in our lives. They become so important, that we just tend to forget their individual existence. We wake up with them, and sleep with them, most times they being the first and the last thought in our heads in the day.
Yet I am selfish. Human! I still deny giving up on certain qualities, so to say. When I get the same in return from them, I go ballistic. "How dare they? Here I am trying to make them feel better, and they have the audacity to treat me with such an arrogant demeanor??" I stomp out outrageously. Feeling highly abrade, not even sparing a moment to actually clearly see the issue at hand. Is it really important right now to see how I am treated, or is it more important to make sure that they are feeling better. But Alas, another human tendency, the big E word...Yes 'Ego'. Now that I have chosen to walk out of the scene, how do I return? And then the long haul waiting for them to revert...
And while I wait, I think, why would they? Why should they? It is only human to be selfish and have ego hassles, and yet how do they always manage to never ever get these in between us? And then a bright thought. So true, and so fierce, makes me go weak in my knees. Just the way the above said are human tendencies, so are love, compassion and sympathy. Now its on us humans to choose which one dominates us, and which is dominated by us. Simple, yet difficult to comprehend. More difficult to accept. Took me time to approbate the fact that I was dominated by the former. But I managed to. What helped me was seeing people who love me being dominated by the latter. My inspiration to become a better person. An equal counterpart.
So for all the times I have let the not so good feelings get the better of me, I apologize. And for all the times you have still stood by me, accepted me along with my vices, I am grateful, indebted, and obligated. I know you will not enjoy reading this as much I did writing it. Since you would not want me to be obliged. You do not do things intending them to be favors. You do it for me, as that is the way you are. I love it that way.
It is very difficult to accept our own negatives. Even more difficult is to accept someone else with flaws. Yet we have beautiful people around us who do it all the time. So this is a small acknowledgement to all those people who fall in this category (even though I hate to categorize). I hope I am one such person to someone. I am sure I am. This one is to all the special someones in my life. I love you all!
(P.S.: This is probably my longest post till date. But looking at the topic at hand I could not/ did not want it to be any shorter. Would have loved to go on and on. But still want you to read, so cut it short!)